英语幽默小故事6篇

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英语,幽默,故事

英语幽默小故事6



1Good use of cry 哭的妙用



The parents with their three-yearold son went to see film.



When they walked into the cinema the attendant said to them,



“you’ll have to go out if your son cries。 But we’ll refund



you the tickets。” About half an hour later, the husband



asked his wife, “What do you think of the film?”



“I’ve never seen such a boring film.” His wife answered.



“It’s not worth seeing。"



“I don’t think much of it, either。" The husband said



“Wake the child up and let him cry.”







一对夫妇带着他们3岁的儿子去看电影。进电影院时,服务员对他们说:“如果你们的儿子哭了,你们就得出去。不过我们会给你们退票的。”大约半个小时以后,丈夫对妻子说:“你觉得这电影怎么样?”“我从没看过这么没劲的电影。”妻子回答说,“真不值得看。“我也不喜欢看。”丈夫说:“叫醒孩子,让他哭。"



2What a Smart Wife家有笨妻



A newly married woman was sitting on a chair,



looking vexed when her husband came home.



"What's up? Why do you look so troubled?"



the husband asked. The woman replied,



”I’m so sorry. I was ironing your new suit and



burned a hole in your trousers.” And the man said,



”That's all right. I have another pair that is exactly the same。”






英语幽默小故事6



”Thank God you do。 I used it to mend this pair"



the wife responded.



有一个刚结婚的太太,坐在椅子那边,看起来很懊恼,她先生回家看到她这个样子,就问:‘嗨,你怎么啦?为什么看起来这么懊恼呢?太太说:‘很抱歉,你那件新做的西装裤被我烫坏了,烫成一个洞了。他先生说:‘啊!那个没关系啦!我还有另外一件一样的裤子。 她说:‘是啊,还好我把那件新的拿出来补那件被我烫坏的。'



3Endearing terms



英语幽默故事:可爱的称呼



Bernie was invited to his friend's home for dinner. Morris, the host, preceded every request to his wife by endearing terms calling her Honey My Love, Darling, Sweetheart etc Bernie looked at Morris and remarked, "That is really nice, that after all these years that you have been married, and you keep calling your wife those pet names.” Morris hung his head and whispered," To tell the truth, I forgot her name three years ago.”



Bernie应邀来到他的朋友Morris家吃晚餐.在朋友家,Bernie发现,不管问他老婆什么问题,Morris总要在每句话的前面加上一些亲密的称呼,象蜜糖,我的爱人,亲爱的,甜心等等。BernieMorris说,“你们夫妻俩真够亲密的,结婚这么多年了,你还叫她叫得那么亲密。Morris低下头,小声地对Bernie说,“老实跟你说吧,三年前我忘记老婆的真名是什么了.



4Are you a normal person?你是正常人吗?



During a visit to the mental asylum a visitor asked the director 。.., ”What is the criterion that defines a patient to be institutionalized?” ”Well..." said the director, "we fill up a bathtub and we offer a teaspoon, a teacup, and a bucket to the patient and ask him to empty the bathtub." ”Oh, I understand,” said the visitor。 ”A normal person would choose the bucket as it is larger than the spoon or the teacup。" ”Noooooooo!" answered the director。 ”A normal person would pull the plug.”



参观一所精神病院的时候一个参观者问院长,“你们是用什么标准来决定一个人是否应该被关进精神病院?" “呃… …”院长说,“是这样,我们先给一个浴缸放满水,然后我们给病人一个调茶匙,一个茶杯和一个水桶去把浴缸里面的水放清。" “噢,我明白了” 参观者说。“一个正常人会选择水桶, 因为水桶比茶匙,茶杯的体积大。 “错了”“院长回答”“正常人会把浴缸塞子拔掉".



5、英文幽默老虎来了 Two guys were walking through the jungle All of a sudden, a tiger appears from a distance running towards them.



One of the guys takes out a pair of "Nikes" from his bag and starts to put them on. The other guy with a surprised look and exclaims "Do you think you will run faster than the tiger with those


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